All the Sun For You

A mom, two boys, a husband, and a whole lot of adventure!

Category Archives: Travel


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So… We’re Going

Something big is happening tomorrow.  It’s something I’ve avoided for a VERY long time.  It’s something I’ve come up with every excuse in the book to avoid.  It’s something that has made me feel very uncomfortable just thinking about.

We’re leaving the boys for the first time EVER to go on a trip out-of-town together (I specify “out-of-town” because we did a practice night three weeks ago and we stayed in a hotel downtown).

We need this trip – we’ve needed it since Matthew was probably a year old.  Hell, his pediatrician told us that we had to leave him for an overnight trip for at least 2 nights before he turned 1.  We didn’t listen.  He wasn’t sleeping through the night, he wasn’t weaned, he needed me too much.  Now, Bryson is JUST sleeping through the night, he isn’t weaned, and he needs me too much.

Someone is always going to be having problems sleeping, and someone is always going to need me too much (or so I think).

So… we’re going.

We’re even getting on a plane – two of them, in fact, to get there and then back again.  I used to be a nervous flyer but I’m not so much after living in Chicago for 4 years and having no car to get from Illinois back to Iowa to see my family.  I flew all the time and it took the edge off, because it just had to.  But now with kids – kids I’m leaving behind in the care of their grandparents – I’m a little nervous.

I’m really not that nervous… I’m more nervous about Bryson not being weaned and the hell my mother-in-law will pay for that.  And I’m more nervous that Matthew will get over-excited and they’ll never want to watch the kids again for us.  And I’m more nervous that I’ll come home to a messy house like when Bryson was born (MIL does not pick up the things she gets out) that will need at least 5 hours of my time to get back to normal.  And I’m more nervous that the milk cups and straws won’t get washed well enough each night before being used again.  And I’m more nervous that Bryson’s sleep is going to go to complete and total shit.  But with all that said, I’m still a little nervous about flying without the kids.

****

We got our wills done.  They’re written, signed, notarized, and on their way to the safe deposit box tomorrow morning.  We selected guardians when Matthew was born but just never got around to asking my dad to do the formal wills.  They’re done now, and that brings me much peace.  My dad is a very responsible attorney who has our affairs in perfect order, so I know that if something would happen, the kids are going to be taken care of and swiftly.  There would be no, “we’re not sure what to do’s” because the man does this for his clients all the time.  The only issue is that he’s not thrilled with our guardian selection, because they’re staunch democrats.  HA!

****

All of this travel and will talk makes me think about life insurance, and the fact that we need more on Hottie, specifically, now that Bryson is here.  That’s now on my list for the fall.  But we may be having a third baby if all works out, so maybe we should shelve that for the spring/summer.

No… this fall.

****

Everything is going to be fine.  Matthew is going to have a great time and he’ll be an angel (or a devil disguised as one).  Bryson is going to sleep well because no one in the house will be able to assist him with boobs.  Both boys will eat well because I’ve got all three nights of meals and leftovers for lunch mapped out.  We will be fine because, as we all know, our chances of dying in a plane crash are nothing compared to driving on the road.  My in-laws are probably the ones who are going to suffer in this whole situation… but they signed up for this and they know what they’re possibly getting into.  And the fact that we have notarized wills almost ensures that everything will be OK – because the universe messes with the people who don’t plan ahead – and I’m not one of them!

 


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A Week of Transition

Next week, summer will officially be over in this house.

I’m sort of sad about it.

We had a really great, busy summer – the type of summer I always envisioned with kids.  Weekend trips away, full weeks of summer camps, swimming lessons, trips to the parks and zoo, and a bunch of other random things thrown in there.  Bryson changed leaps and bounds and turned into a bona fide toddler – walking, more talking, stacking blocks, holding his own with his brother, and turning into quite the comedian.  Matthew turned into a big kid overnight – learning to be confident in the water, becoming an excellent talker (you’d never know there was ever a delay there!), mastering how to introduce himself to strangers and soliciting their names in return, and deciding that “I’ll do it myself!” is his preferred way to do EVERYTHING.  Hottie and I somehow found our way out of a rather concerning slump and ended the summer completely in love with one another once again.

So yeah – a little sad to see it end.

But with this seasonal change, our routine is changing too and that’s a great thing!  Matthew starts school again on Tuesday and will be going three half-days a week this year.  I’m going to be his “room mother” – something I’ve wanted to do since we started talking about school but knew it would be too much last year with a new Bryson in the mix.  Hottie’s role is changing a bit at work and he’s looking forward to the change, even if it means a loftier quota goal.  He’s always up for the biggest challenges, and never fails.  We’ll see how this year goes, but I have high hopes for him!  I’m full-on back into my own health and fitness and have a lot of goals of my own in that department, as well as goals to not make things all about me, me, me while sticking to my health goals.  I am a mother, first and foremost, after all!  If I can find time to go to the gym every day, I can find time and ways to keep my kids engaged and soaking up the good stuff that life has to offer!

So this past week has been about transition.

Hottie had to take a work trip to NYC to better engage one of his clients, all while taking part in this fiscal year’s planning meetings remotely.  The timing wasn’t great for him or his partner, but they made it work well enough.  Kicking off the fiscal year is always a time of stress and extra work for Hottie and all of his coworkers – but it’s also a time of intense energy and optimism!

Matthew had his sneak-a-peak at school on Wednesday and was very excited to meet his new teacher (and sad to finally realize that he’s not going to see Mrs. E and Mrs. Y every day – he loved his teachers last year!).  He did great meeting Mrs. S and Mrs. M and introduced himself to them like a pro!  His new classroom is twice as large as last year’s, and I’m excited for him to have more space to explore.  He’s already talking about going to Mrs. S’s “house” next week (everything is a house – the pork house, the chicken house, the yogurt house, Katie’s house (our hair stylist), etc.) and is super excited to play with his new friends!

Bryson is getting more comfortable with his mobility and is making me very aware that parenting him is going to be an entirely different experience than was parenting Matthew.  He is so adventurous and always trusts that he’ll land on his feet (I hope he always does, literally and figuratively).  He is so hilarious, even though he only has 10 words.  He’s going to keep me very entertained when Matthew is in school!  Bryson is still needing two naps a day, but sometimes he takes just one.  Poor kid – he’s always in the car!  This fall is going to be one of big-time effort kicking that one night-time feeding and probably weaning him.  I just don’t think he’ll sleep through the night until he’s weaned.  He likes to have a visit from mama (and her boobs).

I’ve spent the last week fine-tuning my fitness plan and finally have it worked out to not interfere with school and to maximize my one-on-one time with Bryson while Matthew’s in school.  We bought a punching bag for the garage and I started running this week, so I’ll do those things on strength days and then serious cardio 3-4 days a week at the Y.  I’ll still be going to the Y probably 6 days a week, but at times that work better for the boys.  I’ve also taken a step back from a friendship this week that was becoming a bit toxic.  I need to write a post all about that, just to get it out, but it’s worth a mention because I’ve been trying to find a way to step back for months but finally found a way yesterday – during transition week.

Like I mentioned earlier, Hottie and I have really found our ways back to one another.  We left the boys overnight for the first time ever last Saturday in preparation for our trip to Colorado without them in two weeks.  We plan to leave them again later in the fall for a weekend.  We’ve been going out on more dates and have been really making each other a priority – and it feels great!  We’re getting back into fitness together – the entire reason we met in the first place – and are working out together whenever we can.  When I finished my 10 week fitness program on Saturday, Hottie and I went out for our night without the boys and he had a card for me that was so nice and so thoughtful – that I cried.  He texted me last night after the frustrating exchange with my friend and told me that I’m a great mom and “AWESOME wife” – something I’m not sure he’s said much in the last couple of years (man, having young kids is hard on relationships, isn’t it?  How do we forget to care properly for one another?).  I know I’m riding on a high here, but it feels like a great transition that we desperately needed.

Change is good.  Change is necessary.  Change is the name of the game.  I’m just glad we took a week to really focus on the transition and embrace what the changes mean.  So often, things change without us noticing, but I knew back on 8/1 that this week would be one of reflection and transition – and it’s been good!

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We Keep On Trying

We got a wild hair to bring the boys to Chic.ago for their annual air and water show. We booked it just a couple of weeks ago and before finalizing, B asked, “are you sure you want to do this?” Vacationing with a bad sleeper is hard, and B knew it would fall on me.

But I always say, “we do this so we can say we did and we end up stronger in the end.” Ha!

Right now, Matthew is asleep with B and Bryson is in the GoCrib (for now). I’m not delusional, it’s just a matter of time before Bryson’s in bed with me. But right now, I feel like I’m winning just a little.


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Blog Babies Meet Up #? (I think I’ve lost count!)

When I first started blogging, Steph started following me early on. Her blog was crazy pink and all-girl, while mine was all-boy. We lived close to each other so the next time my family headed their way, we met up. It was my first blog meet-up… And it felt surprisingly natural. We went her direction again and met up again, and again in Chi-Blogo, and again in KC, and again, and now once again. Our kids are getting to be friends and Matthew remembered Chloe this time when we told him where we were going this weekend.

Fun stuff – and special!

We usually struggle to get good photos of our kids together, especially now that there are four of them (wow!). This time, we got a decent photo of all four kids together! I feel lucky! But if we hadn’t gotten a good photo this time, there wouldn’t have been anything to worry about since we’ll be back again!


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The Monday Snapshot – Back to Normal

We spent the weekend sharing two cabins amongst B’s immediate family (MIL, FIL, SIL1, SIL2, BIL, niece, nephew, the four of us). It was, surprisingly, a very fun, comfortable time. The only issue, and I truly mean ONLY issue, was our niece who is very mean, selfish, and manipulative with everyone, but specifically with Matthew. By the end of the weekend, Matthew had started mimicking her nasty behavior (being antagonistic, pushing Bryson over, claiming everything as his) and I was pretty upset. It’s hard when you spend lots of time with people who parent so differently from you, that you need to expend most of your energy running interference between the kids. My SIL does not correct her daughter, and claims that everything she does is “just helping.” Sneakily pulling a chair out from under a two year old is not helping. Running toward him and shoving him backwards off his feet and onto the floor, and then telling us that “he slipped,” is not helping. Calling Matthew over for a hug, and then kicking him in the face telling him not to touch her is not helping. This went on ALL weekend, and her mother stepped in only a few times. Other than that, she’d say, “I know you’re just helping him.”. Gah! So I stepped in, and B stepped in, and called both kids out on their behavior all weekend.

We’re home now, and we’re sort of “reprogramming” Matthew into the nice boy we took on vacation with us. We’ve heard fewer, “mine’s” out of him today, and he’s only pushed Bryson down once. We’re getting there.

And everyone is napping and sleeping in their rightful places again!

(Please don’t think that I think Matthew is perfect. He’s not. Just ask the neighbor boy he bit (first time for that – GAH!) last week and his preschool teachers who keep teaching him to NOT TAKE TOYS FROM HIS FRIENDS! Ha!)


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Wrapping up the Holidays

Here we are, it’s 2014, and I haven’t visited my own blog in ages. So sad… so very sad.

Things have been busy with the holidays.  My parents planned a family trip to Colorado starting on Christmas Eve, lasting until the 27th, and that trip put a wrench in everything holidays-related.  We were scrambling to buy gifts in time to ship them to the hotel, get things for the flight (stroller, accessories, car seat bag), and pack all four of us up for a four-day trip.  The trip preparations put a damper on everything else, including decorating the house and getting the lights up outside (which never happened).  Needless to say, I was a total Scrooge this year.  It just didn’t feel like Christmas.  I felt robbed – and I still do – in a way.

The trip was great – well – great in an “adult trip” sort of way.  The resort was fantastic (a very special place to my family and a resort that B and I have travelled to many times because it’s special to us too!), the room was spacious (my father insists we call it a suite, which is sooooo not me!), seeing my sisters and their kids was unforgettable, and the food was great.  But my goodness – B and I spent so much time in the room suite with napping/sleeping kids that I felt like I wasn’t able to do the things we were there to do (spend time with my parents, sisters, and their families) and that made me very grumpy.  I wasn’t upset with the kids – they nap (and well) and go to bed early (thank God!) – I was upset that we took our kids away from home ON Christmas to spend it in an unfamiliar place.  The times we spent with my family WERE great and super fun, but I just felt so disconnected from the whole thing, including Christmas in general.  I have nicely told my dad that we will not be doing that again while we have small kids – and he gets it.  I think he knows it was hard for my younger sister and me (she has 3 young kids who nap and go to bed early as well).

(I do want to make a note here that both Matthew and Bryson were complete angels on both flights.  Matthew sat in the big seat without his car seat, and he sat still and was a good boy both ways (and slept the entire return flight).  Bryson nursed and slept on the way up for both flights and flirted with everyone once we reached our cruising altitudes.  The descent on the return flight got to his ears and he cried, but no one can be upset about that.  Poor baby.  We are going to fly again this spring and are super calm about it now knowing how well the boys did for this trip.)

We celebrated with B’s family the weekend before Christmas and it was nice!  There were some annoying things like our 4 year-old niece being nasty to Matthew and our nephew constantly referring to Matthew as, “that kid,” but I put a stop to both of those situations immediately so that we could move on with merriment.  HA!  Matthew still is not into opening presents and I had to give him a time-out to get him to come sit with us to open his gifts.  After doing that, I read that that was the entirely WRONG thing to do so relaxed a great deal about his lack of interest in his gifts both in Colorado and then at our house on the 29th.  I’m learning… I’m learning  😉

We got home from Colorado on the 27th and no gifts were wrapped, so we didn’t celebrate on the 28th.  On the morning of the 28th, we felt a strong need to see B’s parents and let the kids have some good interaction with grandparents who are into them (my parents are not into any of the kids – they just aren’t).  That was good for my soul – it was great to be with B’s parents who are so happy to see us whenever we can make it work (every other week or so) and it was nice to just be still with them.  I’m not sure that makes sense – but that’s how it felt.  I always leave them feeling relaxed, which was not always the case.  B’s mom and I have come a  very long way in our relationship and respect for one another.  It feels good!

We finally did our Christmas on the 29th.  The best part about it was wrapping presents the night before.  B and I setup shop in the basement and I put the art easel together as he wrapped, wrapped, wrapped!  He bought a bunch of fun little toys for the boys, things I hadn’t seen yet, and he wanted to keep it that way so that I was surprised when the boys opened their gifts as well.  That was fun!  I picked out the discovery tower (for the kitchen) and the easel and put them both together since they were my ideas and because I like putting things together.  It worked out great!  I got a little tipsy with my favorite beer – hooray!  The next morning, Matthew took forever opening his gifts which was A-OK with me.  He got some super fun stuff from B and it was fun to see his reaction to things.  B is an AWESOME gift giver for the kids!  And this year – he NAILED it with his gift for me.  It made me cry a bit.

I got a wild hair on (our) Christmas morning and asked B if he wanted me to make a big prime rib dinner if I could find a roast (being after Christmas and all).  Of course he said yes (he loves my prime rib… and I will say that it is pretty good thank-you-Williams-So.noma!) so I got to work and spent almost 7 hours in the kitchen cooking, cooking, cooking.  Oh my god, it was like the best gift to myself!  Cooking big dinners relaxes me a great deal – prepping food calms my nerves.  I made cheese fondue (gruyere cheese, Emmentaler cheese, dry white wine, salt, pepper) as our appetizer, endive salads with blue cheese and bacon, prime rib and roasted asparagus, and chocolate fondue for dessert.  It was awesome – so fun to sit down to a multi-course meal together as a family!  We invited B’s brother who is always a fun addition to the evening!

So our holidays ended much better than they started.  They ended with loving grandparents, a happy family unit, well-rested kids (finally!), perfect gifts, and a fantastic (if I do say so myself) dinner.  Finally – finally – it felt like Christmas 4 days after the fact.

Our tree is undecorated and ready for the wood chipper.  The kids are back to their normal sleeping routines (Bryson is sleeping almost through the night with an early morning feeding sometime between 3:45 and 5:45 before sleeping again until 7:00-8:00 each morning).  Our laundry from the trip (and afterwards) is almost all caught up.  All of the new toys have homes within our home.  NYE was celebrated in an unconventional way by letting Matthew stay up to watch The Po.lar Exp.ress in our bed and then sleep all night with us (oh the joy!).  And we’re now looking forward to a 2014 full of travel (starting Jan 9th to KC) and better fitness… and much-needed (and deserved) sleep.

As my Aunt Linda loves to say – HUZZAH!