I don’t even know how to start this post, and I wonder why I’m putting it out there in the first place. But, this is part of my life and I need to say it because it’s my reality.
My aunt has lots of cancer. My aunt, the one who has been so supportive of me and is the mother of my favorite cousin (SK who lived with us this summer, and she’s also Sam’s mom), looks to have liver, pancreatic, stomach, and bone metastatic lesions. The clinical report was sent to the entire family and although it’s not conclusive, the oncologist is pretty sure he’s right and that this is not curable. He does say, though, that it’s somewhat manageable.
I’m always a realist, but can usually snap into a hopeful mood about these types of things pretty quickly. This time, I just can’t get there. It’s just too close to Jenny dying, and my friend’s nephew dying, of cancer to feel all, “rah rah rah you’ll beat this.”
Because so far, the people I’ve known and loved with cancer recently… they haven’t beat it. And in our family, on both my dad’s and mom’s side, no one has died of cancer. We knew a time would come that our luck would run out, but this is rather shocking. My aunt K is the youngest of 7, and she’s 10 years younger than my mom who is the 6th child. When Sam was hurt this past summer, it was really hard because he was the youngest grandchild, everyone’s baby. My aunt K is her siblings’ baby, and this is feeling like it just can’t be.
So… 2016 isn’t starting out so great. We didn’t even get out of January without devastating news.
I feel like a serious weight is sitting on me. Not resting briefly, but camping out.
January 31, 2016 at 10:06 pm
I am so sorry! Sending you so much love right now. This is one of those moments where I hate that we know each other via blogs, I wish I could bring you a warm coffee and sit and cry with you.
February 1, 2016 at 1:59 am
Oh no. I’m sorry that you’ve had such bad news and that you have this fear hanging over you. I don’t know any genetic relatives but I always wonder if it would be better or worse to know about family health issues. I’m sorry that 2016 has started in a not nice way for you. X
February 1, 2016 at 2:35 am
I’m so sorry to hear this and it’s so hard to know what to say in these situations. Really crappy luck. Sending you a hug x
February 2, 2016 at 2:07 am
So sorry to hear you have more bad news. I do hope that you get some good news sooner rather than later.
February 2, 2016 at 6:22 am
Oh, Court, I am so so so sorry. I hope that the weight packs it in soon. I hope that maybe an actual management plan will help with that. I’ll be thinking of you and all the family.
I hate that the year is off to this start. We had a shocking loss a couple weeks back and I couldn’t help but think, “Seriously, 2016? Really?! So you’re gonna be like that, huh?”
February 2, 2016 at 10:26 am
So sorry to hear this. Ugh.
February 16, 2016 at 3:53 pm
Oh hon, i’m so far behind on blogs and just reading this. I’m so sorry to hear about your Aunt. This is how I felt 2 years ago when we lost 4 family members within a matter of months. It just weighs heavily on your heart and mind all the time. I pray you come out of this cycle soon. ❤