I guess my dad and I are in one of those silent wars that he and my mom wage against you, without telling you.
What kind of a father doesn’t respond to his daughter’s email, and later text, about her friend dying? It’s been almost 36 hours since I sent my dad a text…. A man who sleeps with his phone… A man who expects a return text to everything he sends (including pictures of his cat)… A man who sends texts in the middle of the night to his kids….
I just don’t get it… and I hardly even care.
Hi, there, I’m Courtney. I never planned to stay home with my kids, but I got sucked into motherhood when my first baby came into our lives after years of infertility and multiple rounds of IVF. His brother followed closely behind, something we didn’t plan on after having such a rough road with achieving parenthood the first time around. My boys are IVF cycle twins, conceived on the same day but born two years and one day apart (they were both transferred on the same day in October, but with two years between them). My boys are the best of friends and my husband is a terrific husband, father, and most importantly… friend. He fully supported my desire to stay home (“I just wanted it to be your idea and not mine, I totally want you to stay home and raise our kids!”) and encourages me in everything I do.
I am a lover of projects, spreadsheets, fitness, healthy cooking and eating, crafts, selling my stuff on FB (HA!), and the outdoors. If I’m active, I’m pretty darn happy!
December 13, 2015 at 10:39 pm
Some people are arseholes. Pure and simple. Hugs my friend. One of my besties told me yesterday she text and rang her mum to tell her she was in Queensland, you know 1200km closer than she normally is and her mum didn’t even respond. What a cow. some parents should have been made infertile.
December 13, 2015 at 11:54 pm
Your poor friend…. That’s terrible.
At least I’m learning first hand how NOT to treat my own kids. I mean, it goes without saying but I’ll always remember this and not want to make them feel even 10% how he made me feel when I realized he hasn’t said anything.
December 13, 2015 at 10:48 pm
I am so sorry my friend. There is simply no excuse for this complete lack of a response, particularly considering the circumstance. I am adamant that family is not defined by biology but rather by love. And I am so sorry that you have lost such a dear friend who was (and still is) a member of your famiky. And at the same time I am sorry your family is not there for you when you need them the most.
December 13, 2015 at 11:52 pm
The thing is, I almost don’t care. I’ve learned to expect nothing from him. My mom, who I’m not close to, knew jenny and I knew she’d want to know. I’ve kept her updated and she has not only respected my desire to not talk, but rather email, about it – but she’s also sent very supportive emails. My sisters, of course, have been wonderful. My dad, after not responding to my email to them all on Thursday where I addressed him directly, is the ass (yes, I said it). The text I sent him was asking to please tell my mom that she had JUST passed an hour earlier and he didn’t even respond to say he’d told her. Just nothing. It dawned on me today, 24 hours later, that he never responded. So I’m shocked and a bit hurt, but at the same time i don’t care.
December 14, 2015 at 8:51 am
I truly understand this. I too am getting to the point of just not caring anymore. Part of me find’s it rather sad to be at that point, and another part of me finds it very freeing.
December 13, 2015 at 11:38 pm
That is some fucked up shit. I don’t even have the words (besides the ones I already used). I’m sorry C. You deserve so much better.
December 13, 2015 at 11:55 pm
Yeah, it is fucked up. No matter how little I care about it…. It IS fucked up.
December 14, 2015 at 1:37 am
I am so sorry you are hurting from losing your friend and because your parents are unreliable. People are strange creatures sometimes. It sounds like you are being an awesome friend to others that need it right now. You are being kind and generous with your time and love that’s the important stuff. My parents are amazing but my husbands just weird. They haven’t spoken to us since our son was born as he has my last name. Go figure people make weird decisions!!
December 17, 2015 at 10:11 pm
People are weird, aren’t they? Since posting this, so many people have mentioned their own weird parents or in-laws.
Thank you for your kind words.
December 14, 2015 at 10:19 am
😦 Ugh, I’m sorry C. That’s just shitty on so many levels.
December 17, 2015 at 10:12 pm
Thanks. We’ve been friends long enough for you to know that this is not unusual behavior for them. Bad, but not unusual. Ugh.
December 14, 2015 at 3:29 pm
I think we have the same dad. I’m sorry.
December 17, 2015 at 10:13 pm
We’re soul sisters in a lot of ways. 😉 Stupid dads! Ha!
December 16, 2015 at 8:16 pm
Damnit.. I am sorry. This is absolutely not what you need right now. So glad you have Hottie and your sweet boys to show you love and support when you need it most.
December 17, 2015 at 10:14 pm
Thank you. Unfortunately, this is normal for him, which makes it feel sort of ok.